Changing clothes or changing roles?

I found this weeks reading very interesting, it was about how we change clothes and even identity when we go into different social roles. It struck me how much I change my role both in clothes, communication and sometimes even personality depending on if I am working, if I am in school, if I am with my friends just hanging out or if I am at a family dinner. I have a different social role in all those different situations and I haven’t really thought about it like that before.

Isn’t it interesting how people get mad or disappointed at you for “not being yourself lately” or that you “change depending on who you’re talking to”, but isn’t that the way it is supposed to be? I don’t know anymore. I have been in a lot of conversations where people accused me of change (as if that is a bad thing?) or me being different in different situations? But it is really all about what social role we are playing in that moment and that is for sure how it is supposed to be if you ask me. 

             I mean what would happen if we all started talking to our manager the same way we talk to our best friend? Or if we only talked about work at the dinner table? Or even worse, if we talked about important, private family issues at work? Or what happens if we start talking about last weeks crazy party, how many drinks we had or who hooked up with who at the dinner table with our grand parents or at a conference meeting with our company? Social roles are important and we all need to play by the rules of communication to get by, both orally and in writing.

As we can see in this weeks reading, changing your clothes, communication and approach depending on what social role you’re in at the moment is important and I would say that it is necessary. So next time someone asks you why you’re not being yourself lately the answer is simple, they’re just seeing you in a different environment or with different company. It is not about you changing. And if so, there is nothing that says that change must be negative. We all grow and we all change over time, anything else would be a failure.